How to Find a Mistress
I’ve seen a whole wave of newbies recently whom seem to have this question.
“I’m interested in exploring my fetishes, where can I find a Mistress?”
There’s no one-stop solution, but here’s some simple do’s and don’ts.
Whilst ideas and inspirations for new blogs are brewing, including a couple of drafts already written, I wanted to reflect on why I do this blog in the first place.
Whilst it’s certainly evolved from the early days, some of the core reasons for doing this have to go into every post, else I feel I’m doing it wrong.
Initially, I started just with ad hoc writings on Fetlife.
Usually unplanned, knee jerk, reflecting on how I either felt at the time, or in response of something happening.
In ways. These are probably some of my best. In ways.
We’re barely into January and there’s already the rumbling of those who maybe made their New Years Resolution “Explore my kink side”.
I kinda get the “New Year” thing. That perhaps there’s something in your life you’ve been putting off doing, for whatever reason, so the turn of the calendar year can be a prompt to do it.
Or of course, it’s easier to think in targets against a calendar year.
I also know newcomers come in all different shapes and sizes – be it people with experience coming back… couples looking to enhance their relationship… those looking for a relationship… those seeking to explore fantasies… so forth.
Some of this is all great stuff.
I think there’s sometimes a polar in “sub” guys who get it wrong.
1) I’ll do anything, I have no limits
2) I want to serve you by doing all my fetishes and fantasies.
On the surface, one guy is too open and the other is too closed.
Different Types of Timewaster
And, how not to be one.
We all know about deliberate and blatant timewasters – though, we often assume timewaster = someone who books a session and doesn’t show, or overmilks a conversation without a firm booking. Or pretends to have bought something from a Wishlist (perhaps even buys, sends ‘proof’ then cancels the order)
They know exactly what they’re doing.
I’ve heard this call a lot over the years. Recently a couple of threads on Twitter and Fetlife have prompted me to this mini burst.
Without addressing any specific points.
There’s no such thing as free
I’m going to address this by talking about some of the experiences of myself and my wife and arguably some of the others I’ve played with without tribute.
As some of you know, I’ve a bit of a background in the music industry (often described as “my other expensive hobby” – though, neither I see as hobbies, moreso lifestyles – but hey ho)
I’ve often seen many parallels between the music industry and the Femdom industry. So much so it’s scary.