A common fantasy I see raised a lot is the idea of being a live-in slave.
Except, the fantasy is not presented as being a fantasy, but a goal.
Obviously there are people who have this type of relationship, under different structures and results. However, I feel many subs and slaves are often wide of the mark on.
On a forum, someone had started a thread about being accepted for a trial for a live in slave. He wanted to know what to expect.
Personally, I think it’s probably advisable to be clear on expectations before wasting his time and hers with an application. But, OK.
In these posts, the story is the guy had met this Mistress a few times and really liked her, but never took a session for more than 2 hours.
My initial assumption here was that this was someone who was a Professional Dominatrix. But, of course it’s possible for me to be wrong.
Seeing she was looking for live in slaves, he applied, was accepted and was now asking the question on “If it would be worth it”
Concluding, “would it really be exciting to clean the floors and wash the dishes?”
Obviously my assumption was that she was a Pro, though it was unclear whether his question of “worth it” being that it could be a dull 10 days, or whether some form of financial contribution was required and he was thinking purely in terms of value-for-money.
For reasons I will come to, I would be very surprised if some form of financial contribution was not required.
I’ve seen so many variations over the years and, it honestly feels like a lot of guys lack an idea about adulthood, let alone kink.
I imagine the fantasy of being a live-in slave might differ from person to person, but there are common tropes it feels are consistent. Some of which maybe are a rejection of the strains of adult life.
That, perhaps. You live in a home with a beautiful person. Your job is to serve her, and in exchange you obviously have your basic needs met. Something to eat, drink and of course shelter. There might be different levels of fantasy of what that looks like. But it strips away responsibility. There’s no need to worry about work, or bills, or budget. Someone else is doing all that. You just have to do your chores and when she comes in from work, you will need to give her tired feet a massage and then kinky fun time.
Perhaps another variation is one where you do all the housework, whilst naked or dressed up and she follows you around scolding you and/or punishes you for a bad job.
Perhaps within something you are always naked and she is always dressed in whatever your fantasy attire is.
And there’s nothing wrong with these fantasies and sometimes a lot of porn plays about with these fantasies. (It’s something I played around with a bit with some of the scenes we did with Princess Dahlia)
The problem is when you start messaging strangers on the Internet asking to move in with them or, worse, applying to move in (or actually moving in) with someone with a poor grasp on what this means, wasting everyone’s time.
Let’s start with the boring shit
So let’s get really boring.
When you live in the family home – most people I guess will have allocations of chores, taking on more as they get older. They may even be asked to contribute some form of board.
When you move out, suddenly there’s all this other shit. Mortgage/Rent. Council Tax. Utilities. Shopping. As well whatever housework you were doing as ‘your share’, there’s also everything else needs sorting.
This is before we get into things like repairs, or new furniture, or whatever.
When you move in with someone, there are two things happen tying in with both of the above.
The first is that it becomes more expensive just by you being there. Using more heating or hot water. The cost of food and cooking it.
If the person was living alone, you moving in with them will cause their council tax to increase.
This is before there’s then things to consider like bed and bedding.
The second is you being there generates more work.
That the clothes you wear add to the wash load. The dishes you use add to the cleaning. Just walking around spreads dirt and dust.
It is inevitable you will have to contribute financially because you being there costs money.
Housework is Adulthood, not servitude
Whilst you might handwave away about “not being a service slave” or some shit, things like housework is not about being submissive, or live-in slave, it’s about being an adult.
This is a big problem in many, especially vanilla, relationships where often a guy moving in with others is automatically assuming the woman/women will do most of the domestic side of running the house hold. Perhaps just like their mother did.
It’s important to want a girlfriend, a partner, a flat mate, a Mistress, a sub, a wife, whatever – not a mother.
Cost-Cutting ideas are often flawed
A sad bit, is there’s points where the sub then thinks they’re clever. They point out they will just eat scraps, shit and piss and sleep on the floor and be naked all the time and blah.
You cannot get proper nutrition from this. You need proper nutrition in order to have the strength and energy to serve.
There will be times when your Dominant might have houseguests and as a live-in slave you might need to help with this. It doesn’t set a good example if you’re nude, unwashed, tired through poor sleep and still have traces of shit in your teeth.
How things are more likely to be
Unless you are retired, with pension or savings to cover your way – you are going to need to have at least a part time job.
This is going to result in there being an agreed payment you make into the household, possibly with extras.
Due to needing to work, any form of play or activities has to be kept sensible so not to affect your employment. Whilst your Dominant could send you to work with frilly knickers under your pants, you’re going to have to be clean, energised and focused.
And, yes, you are going to be taking on a share of housework along with any other subs or slaves. There’s a good chance you will end up doing more than an even split. You’re supposed to be the person who is dedicating yourself to this persons comfort and happiness.
But what about play?
Now. I’m assuming within this that your Dominant is also working.
Whether they are a Pro-Domme or doing anything else, there’s a good chance that after work they, simply, might not be in the mood.
However, in theory, the less they have to worry about when they get home the more likely they are to be relaxed and find it easier to get in the mood.
Expectations or hopes for play as part of the arrangement should be discussed before you even formally ask, let alone move in.
But, I think if you’re demanding of playtime you probably need to rethink what it means to be submissive.
So you might then conclude. What’s the point? I may as well stick with 2 hour sessions.
Good idea. Because it seems your mind was only wandering towards live in because of what you would get out of it. A hope of getting more in exchange for less.
There are plenty of people who would be overjoyed at being able to see someone they admire every day as their live-in slave. Even if it was just to say good morning and good night some days.
But if you’re fading weighing up what you get , I’m not sure you’re ready for adulthood, let alone submission.