I was in a meeting at work recently where; imagine my surprise when one of the slides showed paddles and canes.
Contextually, it was important.
A lot was talking about different generations and how things influences a lot of attitudes.
So for example; generations that grew up with corporal punishment at school, have different attitudes to authority than those who did not.
Another slide showed a rather rickety older style car seat, and how that compared to more modern day seats (I also learned in the US, car seats have to be fitted and signed off by either a police officer or a fire officer) and this also gives an attitude difference.
On the latter; a lot is around safety and reliance on generations above to have their safety in mind.
On the former; this plays into more hierarchy – so for example motivations for workplace promotions or getting into positions of power differs – so older generations are more likely seek this so they themselves become someone of authority, whereas those younger are more likely to have a collaborative approach and seek leadership positions to help or inspire others.
HYPOTHESIS
In the aftermath, some of this led me to hypothesise about kink, applying to some stuff I already am aware of.
Kink has it’s own generational clashes at times. My general view is the only real wrong way is if it’s not consensual – which in itself might be a sign I’m from a more collaborative generation. Being 43 makes me a millennial, even if it’s “only just”
But of course I’ve seen and heard plenty of comments over the years when people have preached about respect and authority, “subs should do as they’re damn told”, so on so forth – which stems from a generational attitude.
SHAPING TRENDS
I think there’s a lot which shapes trends also. I know for example when discussing caning, the amount of enthusiasts where, if they are the one wielding – they were very much likely to have been caned at school and now they have risen up the ranks to be the one in authority. i.e. they get to set the punishment and wield the cane.
Though those who like to receive it, I see three common reasons (1) is a reclamation, that they maybe weren’t previously caned on their own terms and now by consenting they are (2) is that when at school, pretty much the only thing to fear was the cane and now in adult life there’s so much more (bills, healthy, family, society, etc) and so being taken back to regress is escapism (3) like a lot of school-based-kinks a lot of people first went through puberty when at school so there’s a lot which is psychologically linked.
Obviously we could add in yummy yummy endorphins, but they can be achieved by many methods.
I feel people outside of those generations enjoy caning for different reasons; I don’t know why but I was interested in caning in literature because it wasn’t all that long after it had been banned – so it was still mentioned in a lot of books (I distinctively remember the scene in ‘Danny, Champion of the World’ written just 6 years before I was born, even if it was set 20 years prior) – though like a lot in kink I think some feel they have to.
ROLE OF THE INTERNET
I also always felt a big influence on shifting kink trends was the internet.
Prior to widespread internet usage, a lot of people only really learnt from what they had read or what people in their community told them.
If someone told them that they were upholding 1000 year old traditions, then the other person didn’t actually know otherwise.
If someone said that you kinda HAVE to do certain things or REAL subs/Doms have to do certain things or act in certain ways or blah blah – then again there’s no alternative viewpoint.
However of course the take off of the internet led again to more collaborative approaches, so people shared ideas rather than things being “this is how it is”
PEOPLE THESE DAYS!
I figure some of this also ties in a little with the whole “subs (or Doms!) these days!” style of rants, in the sense that younger subs are less likely to be interested in authority figure Dominants (meaning older authority Dominants need someone their own age ;)) and particularly when looking older, seeing Dominants more as someone who ‘keeps them safe’
And of course our younger Dominants, I know they get ranted about, “you can’t just give yourself a title!” (why not, you did?) but certainly anyone younger who just wants to bark orders pretty much has low chance cos of reasons above (older subs will not see you as being in authority, whereas younger subs will care less) which is probably why many younger Dominants often end in more collaborative roles.
Of course, exceptions apply – the hot young Findom, and while she is someone who rattles all purists, she still taps into the whole “you could lose everything to a hot, spoilt, brat” mindset which some find appealing. If you don’t, that’s fair – I guess just a reminder of… so long as it’s consensual between partners.
Anyhow.
Ultimately, I think (which was part of the point of the meeting I was in) generations work better when they work together. Apparently studies show that work place/teams with different generations have better results than places/teams where it’s mostly a similar generation.
Leave a Reply