He came online and had a raging boner
he bothered women like a stupid loner
That’s where She,
Got his mail

He said he he wanted to be her servant,
She said, “In that case I’ll have a tribute
He said why?
And in thirty seconds time he said,

I want to live like kinky people,
I want to do whatever kinky people do,
I want to sleep with kinky people,
I want to sleep with kinky people,
Like you.

For some strange reason
She said, “I’ll see what I can do”
She took him to a kinky market
She doesn’t know why
But gave in and started somewhere
so it started there
He pretended he had no money
She was unimpressed,
He said “you’re so funny”
She said “Yeah?”
Well I’m not fucking smiling here
Are you sure you want to live like kinky people
you want to see whatever kinky people see
you want to sleep with kinky people
you want to sleep with kinky people
Like me?

He just didn’t understand
She walked off with head in hands.
Read a blog about the scene
go to events and listen to people
Pay a tribute or book a session
See if you can learn a lesson
But still you’ll never get it right
cause when you’re laid in bed at night
or masturbating on your settee
you just wanted it all for free.

You’ll never live like kinky people,
You’ll never do whatever kinky people do,
You’ll never play with kinky people,
You’ll never be that guy in the scene,
And play and dance and serve,
Because it’s not what you deserve.

Sing along with the kinky people,
Sing along and it might just get you through.
Laugh along with the kinky people,
Laugh along even though they’re ignoring you,
And the stupid things that you do.
Because you think this for you.

Like a twitter admin in a corner,
They will block you and never warn you,
Look out, they’ll tear your ego out.
‘Cause everybody hates a tourist,
Especially one who thinks it’s easy kink,
Yeah there’s no “sluts” wanna meet
it’s not as easy as you think