eyemblacksheep

Journey and Opinions of a BDSM Kinkster

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Opinion Pieces

Consent : A Survey

As you may have seen, this week off the cuff I decided to create a survey about consent and abuse of.

A link to the survey is here.

I wanted to use this blog in order to.
– Clarify what I want from the survey
– Go through Data Protection
– Apologise for some shortfalls.

Taking Shortcuts – The quick way to (not) get what you want

There are so many scenarios I can relate this to – and I’m sure most of you have either had someone attempt to take a short cut with you, or you’re possibly looking for the quickest way to get from where you are to where you want to be.
So, you want to go from being single guy to owned slave, skint lady to wealthy findom or person not getting play to person getting play.
Or perhaps you’re looking for someone who is doing this to help guide you, “show you the way”, pass on their contacts, give you a chance, or whatever.
Read on.

A blog about my blog

Whilst ideas and inspirations for new blogs are brewing, including a couple of drafts already written, I wanted to reflect on why I do this blog in the first place.

Whilst it’s certainly evolved from the early days, some of the core reasons for doing this have to go into every post, else I feel I’m doing it wrong.

Initially, I started just with ad hoc writings on Fetlife.

Usually unplanned, knee jerk, reflecting on how I either felt at the time, or in response of something happening.

In ways. These are probably some of my best. In ways.

Those whose New Year Resolution is “Explore my Kinky Side”

We’re barely into January and there’s already the rumbling of those who maybe made their New Years Resolution “Explore my kink side”.

I kinda get the “New Year” thing. That perhaps there’s something in your life you’ve been putting off doing, for whatever reason, so the turn of the calendar year can be a prompt to do it.

Or of course, it’s easier to think in targets against a calendar year.

I also know newcomers come in all different shapes and sizes – be it people with experience coming back… couples looking to enhance their relationship… those looking for a relationship… those seeking to explore fantasies… so forth.

Some of this is all great stuff.

I’ll do anything (as long as it’s my fetish)

I think there’s sometimes a polar in “sub” guys who get it wrong.

Be it:
1) I’ll do anything, I have no limits
or
2) I want to serve you by doing all my fetishes and fantasies.

On the surface, one guy is too open and the other is too closed.

Different Types of Timewaster

Different Types of Timewaster

And, how not to be one.

We all know about deliberate and blatant timewasters – though, we often assume timewaster = someone who books a session and doesn’t show, or overmilks a conversation without a firm booking. Or pretends to have bought something from a Wishlist (perhaps even buys, sends ‘proof’ then cancels the order)

They know exactly what they’re doing.

If she loved it she’d do it for free

I’ve heard this call a lot over the years. Recently a couple of threads on Twitter and Fetlife have prompted me to this mini burst.

Without addressing any specific points.

There’s no such thing as free

I’m going to address this by talking about some of the experiences of myself and my wife and arguably some of the others I’ve played with without tribute.

Mistresses are Rock Stars

As some of you know, I’ve a bit of a background in the music industry (often described as “my other expensive hobby” – though, neither I see as hobbies, moreso lifestyles – but hey ho)

I’ve often seen many parallels between the music industry and the Femdom industry. So much so it’s scary.

Only Fans and Horses

There’s been a rise recently in Premiem Content playforms, by that I mean stuff like OnlyFans, Premium Snapchat and a few other bits popping up here and there.
Inevitably, this has led to a rise in disapproval in them, be this from those outspoken against them, or those frustrated content they want is behind a paywall.

For those frustrated.
That’s the point.

What will you do when the person you admire retires?

Mistress Ana posed a question on twitter earlier this week.

What will you do when the person you admire most, whoever they are, retires and completely washes their hands of adult/sex work?

It’s actually a fear of mine.
And reminds me of the fragility of everything.

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