Journey and Opinions of a BDSM Kinkster

Month

March 2018

Do guys who bitch about Findom lack self awareness?

I was reading yet-another bitching-about-Findom thread the other day.

It’s kinda sobering the lack of self awareness some of these guys have.

It has happened, but it’s very rare I get cold contacted by a Findom – and – I’ll usually be polite unless she fails to take the, well, hint, that handing over money to someone random is most certainly not my kink.

Finding the perfect(?) gift

There’s a lot said around gifting and tribute. Whether this is within the whole Findom “spoil me” kind of thing. Or gifts when meeting, or after meeting, or for a birthday or Christmas… or just because.

A lot of this post I’m going to explain my own mindset, but some of this may be helpful if you want to gift someone and trying to impress them.

Back to Basics : Consent & Negotiating Play

A logical next chapter in my ‘Back to Basics’ series is around consent and arranging play.

The assumption of your position is that perhaps you’ve got talking with someone who would also like to play with you sometime.

Examples could include :
– chatting online
– discussing at a munch
– at an event and the topic comes up
– approaching a professional about booking a session

It may be you have had some opportunity to try certain things informally. For example at a workshop, or slapping a flogger on your hand or something. It might not. read more

Consent and Abuse Survey : The Results

Recently, I conducted a survey to do some research around consent and violations and the management of these within BDSM.
The reasons were two-fold, firstly for my own understanding.
That, I of course have my own opinions and understanding, but it’s important to know how people feel about this wider.
One potential problem sometimes is being in our own little bubbles and I can’t present ‘facts’ without them.
So, secondly, to present facts.
Do people feel their concerns were, or would be, dealt with – and general attitude towards the scene.
Whilst I did have some of my own expectations on the result – some things came back differently to how I expected, some better some worse.

Finding a Mistress – Do’s and Don’ts

How to Find a Mistress

I’ve seen a whole wave of newbies recently whom seem to have this question.

“I’m interested in exploring my fetishes, where can I find a Mistress?”

Or varients.

There’s no one-stop solution, but here’s some simple do’s and don’ts.

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